“ … I was not really interested, as I had known her about 30 years ago …”
From Oliver: I had been single for six years, and I missed having a terminal in my life. I had a few relationships, but they just didn’t work out, no matter how much I pretended that they were okay. There was something missing. Fact is, I’m not easy to get along with. I have my beliefs and it took me a while to figure out that others couldn’t necessarily understand or have them. I also work and work and work and study and study and study and get involved with this or that activity – so I am VERY BUSY! Moonlight strolls along a sandy beach? Not likely. Now what kind of woman could put up with that? Not many.
But I am an engineer who uses lots of mathematics, and just looking at simple arithmetic (3.5 billion women on the planet, 70 million in the right age group, thousands who are Scientologists), plus having strong intention and all the magic that Scientology technology offers, the odds of finding a suitable spouse were very good.
(As an aside, here’s my advice for people looking for a partner: practice rejection, then it won’t bother you as much. Finding a spouse is a numbers game mixed with affinity, reality, lots of communication, administrative scales, conditions, “name-want-get,” and plain “chemistry.” Just because you were rejected doesn’t mean that there might not be someone out there who really wants you).
The Affinity Exchange was the obvious place to start as it’s full of attractive Scientology women who have potential. After posting my profile, I began outflowing. I received responses from women from all over—even Russia, Brazil, Africa, etc.
Then one day I received an email from Carmen. I was not really interested, as I had known her about 30 years ago when I was married. At the time, she was a sexy, sparkling, energetic teenager with lots of intention. Nevertheless, I sent her a nice email and arranged to meet her. I enjoy going out, even if I don’t intend on making it a long term relationship.
It took about three dates before it hit me. Carmen was perfect for me! She had the persistence and toughness to put up with a guy like me. She did not fold when the going got tough, could be “mean and nasty” when required and very caring the rest of the time. She also understood the game I was playing as she was playing a similar game.
Maybe some people have blue birds and butterflies appear out of nowhere when they meet their true love. Me…I was in shock! Gawd! I’d met someone I was truly interested in who had similar intentions to my own and could put up with a guy like me. What do I do now? Well, what I did was dated her for well over a year and, once I knew that she was the one I wanted to marry, I married her!
From Carmen: I knew Oliver many years ago when I was still a teenager. I thought, oh well, he’s married. The years went by. I married and somehow stayed married for ten years. After the divorce, I had a few boyfriends, but I never did find the guy I was looking for.
Wanting to find a man with similar goals, I turned to the Affinity Exchange. After four months of unsuccessful dating, Oliver’s picture showed up as an Affinity Exchange Premier Member. I was astonished! At first, I wasn’t sure he if he would want to go out with me, as when we were work associates, we were friendly but not necessarily good friends. I did a little research into what I really wanted in a guy, and when I looked at my own goals and purposes, he matched them. So I sent him a ‘’hello’’ on the website. I really wanted to talk to him and find out if he was still the same likable guy he was back when.
I went out with him once a week for about two months to make sure that he was the right guy before going any further. He spent time helping me to further my goals, for which I am very grateful, and I worked to improve his life as well. I found out he was very picky, but still my affinity for him continued to grow.
We wound up getting married at the Ideal Church in Las Vegas on December 24, 2012–1½ years after we connected through the Affinity-Exchange. We are very happy together and get along wonderfully. Thank you, Marcia, for providing this wonderful service.